Monk >>
thứ bảy tháng 9 2 - 12:04 Just as a matter of interest, give this a thumbs up if you get it, a thumbs down if it doesn’t make any sense. I won’t take it personally.
“Hello, Frank. How did the football go today?”
“Ooh, Betty. Not very well, really.”
“Oh dear. You didn’t get splinters in your bottom again from sitting on the bench, did you Frank?”
“No, it was worse than that. Little Shaun Ennix was injured so I had to play in goal. It was very scary. So scary in fact, that I had to do a whoopsie against the goal post after five minutes. All the Canvey fans were laughing at me. It was very embarrassing. And then they started throwing toilet rolls at me in case I needed that. It made it very difficult to concentrate on the game.”
“Did you manage to make any saves?”
“No, not today. But we did manage to get a 3-3 draw, which the Abbot said was ’a bloody miracle’, so I suppose that’s good, but I don’t like the way that man looks at me. It’s very intimidating when you are trying to do your best. He was so angry at the end of the game that he threw a corner flag at me. I told him to be careful, he could have had my eye out with that.”
“Oh dear. I suppose the manager isn’t very happy either?”
”No, Mr Monk is very nice. He said that he hadn’t enjoyed a game that much for years and that I am worth every penny of the £4,500 a week he is paying me. Apparently, he wants me to have a lifetime contract, which is nice. Hmm. That’ll be really useful for repairing the bathroom after last week’s episode and the rest can go to baby Jessica’s pony bills. Yes, Betty, I’ll stay at Scammonden and do it for you and baby Jessica.”